Say what?

You know you're a parent when you start using your child's words for something in your own vernacular.  People look at you strangely when you say "he's watching meows while eating a diggle with his big bankie and his mimi next to him."


.............

Silence.

Translation: He's watching cat videos while eating a popsicle with his favorite big blanket with his pacifier next to him.

What? You didn't get that the first time?

Oh, F*^#

Munchkin was being his wild self the other day and tripped over a corner of the rug, fell, promptly got up and declared "son of a bitch".........  I look at Hubs and tell him that one is his fault.  "I don't say that," I tell him.

Then two days later he held his bag of popcorn upside down and all the precious kernels came flowing out.  "Oh fuck", he says nonchalantly. Hubs turns to me and says "that one is ALL you, babe."

Son of a bitch, definitely time to stop fuckin' swearing.  (Sorry, had to get a last one in.)

First World Problems

My morning is rife with problems....first world problems.

I stayed up too late watching my big screen TV so now I'm tired.
I forgot to charge the Kindle so my toddler is pissed.
And I can't find the granola for my greek yogurt so I have to eat it plain.

Thank god we weren't out of coffee creamer or shit would've gotten real.

No Kid Zone

I just read an article stating some airlines are toying with the idea of making a "kid free zone" on certain flights.  Apparently people are complaining about the antics and attitudes of children on flights.

As a frequent flyer as well as a mother, I understand a bit of where these people are coming from.  I've been on the flights where the 10-year-old just won't stop kicking your chair or the 4-year-old incessantly screams because he or she is bored/uncomfortable/etc.  Sometimes it's a parenting issue and sometimes it's just one of those days.  Sitting by that can be trying, especially if it's a long flight.

On the other hand, kids on planes get a bad rap.  I've been the person receiving dirty looks at the gate when I roll up with my toddler.  I've also been the recipient of praise after landing from people who didn't even realize I had a toddler on the flight because he was so well behaved.

But I think kids are an easy target.  You know what other kinds of "sections" we should have on planes?  No reclining sections.  I'm 5'2" and even I get cramped when the person in front of me reclines into my knees 5 seconds into a flight.

Why stop there? Why not an "armrest stealing free" section.  You want BOTH arm rests?  Go sit in the back, buddy. I'm in an "armrest for everybody" section.

Moral of the story:  If you don't like flying with other people's loud children?  Invest in some really great ear plugs, and I will too because I'm sick of your bitching.