Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Annoyed With Food

You may ask yourself, how can one be annoyed with food? I, for one, personally love food and have a love/hate relationship with it (as in I love food and hate that it makes me fat). However, living in Detroit I have come to loathe grocery shopping for several reasons. Reason #1: apparently people in gangs don't tend to grocery shop much and chains don't want to open stores in "the ghetto". This means I have one national grocery store chain to shop in that doesn't include Wal-Mart (which is a WHOLE other story). Just Kroger...and some insanely expensive local grocery stores. Just an FYI "big-chain-stores", there are people in Detroit suburbs that don't live in the ghetto! Where the hell am I supposed to get my food??

Reason #2: There is no "off" time to go grocery shopping to avoid the crowds. I've gone first thing in the morning, weekend evenings, late at night, week days. It doesn't matter. I run into old bitties who are worried that I'm going to cut in line at the deli counter, annoying women that park their carts in front of the WHOLE cheese section, people who will literally hip-check you to get to the last "buy-1-get-1" steak. And I can't do a damn thing about it here because as The Hubs says, "it's Detroit, they could shoot you."

Reason #3: Apparently The Hubs and I don't have "Michigan" taste in food. I have to go 20 minutes away to the fancy part of town in order to get the selection I need for just normal stuff we eat. Even Boulder Chips are in the "healthy" aisle. Really? The bags are next to the Kashi cereal and fruit leathers. I never thought I'd be one of "those" people where asking for fresh mozzarella and Boulder Chips elicited looks from store clerks that basically said I'm a Prius Driving, fabric bag toting, tree hugging hippy. What a difference 1400 miles makes. In Denver we were chastized because we didn't eat organic all the time or grow our own hemp to make clothes. Here, you may as well call me crunchy. Go figure.